Kids in Business Series: Brenda and the Endless Job Application

MinimallyUseful
2 min readJul 27, 2020
I’m sure your name is in here somewhere

Reading is hard, so here is the video version if you want.

Brenda was looking through job postings,
when something caught her eye.
If you’re super great -
Click here to apply!

Brenda clicked the link.
It was her lucky day!
The website said in big bold letters
Upload Résumé

Brenda attached her documents
Including cover letter
She went above and beyond
Because she liked her chances better.

She took one last look
Before she sent it away.
She read it aloud
And here’s what it had to say:

“My name is Brenda Turner
My whole life I’ve been a learner
And, if you pick me, I’ll be your top earner!
You will see down below
That all my experience will show
I know all the things you want me to know!”

The message was short.
The message was sweet.
After she clicked send,
She got quite a treat!

Brenda got a message
Saying her documents looked quite fine.
The message asked her
To fill in her job history online.

Brenda took pause
Wondering what she should say.
Didn’t they already have
Her cover letter and résumé?

She filled in all the fields
Copying her résumé line by line.
She read it aloud
To make sure everything was fine.

“My name is Brenda Turner
I’m a lifelong learner
And, if you pick me, I’ll be your top earner!
You’ll see down below
That my history will show
I know all the things that you want me to know!”

Brenda moved her mouse
And clicked submit
She got another immediate reply
But it was full of bulls***.

The reply thanked her
For taking all her time
To fill out the many forms
That had been online

They cited HR
Needing her employer information
So they asked her to complete
ANOTHER APPLICATION

Brenda clicked on the link
And just typed and typed away
And took one more chance
To read what she had to say

My name doesn’t concern you
And if I may speak true
Your failure to honor my time has made me feel quite blue.
I’m withdrawing my name
Because this is quite lame
Filling out three applications is ABSOLUTELY INSANE.

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MinimallyUseful

Doing more by doing less. Creators of the MVP+1 methodology of office survival.